With the break in our reading in lieu of the midterm, some of the themes in the texts have had time to simmer in my brain and be applied to my life, particularly from "Hills Like White Elephants" and "The Pomegranate."
In "Hills Like White Elephants," for pages a couple is speaking without actually communicating. Neither of them actually say what they are feeling, but rather mask their opinion for fear of the other's response. Their conversation is light and ambiguous while the topic they are discussing is in all actuality dark and weighty. This has caused me to evaluate my the communication in my own relationships. Do I speak without actually communicating? Am I too passive-agressive to actually say something? I think that lack of true communication stems from fear of vulnerability and intimacy, rooted in insecurity and a lack of self-confidence. Today I am challenging myself to strive for honest communication. For too long my voice has been muted by the fear that others will not want to hear what it has to say. Honesty, even when uncomfortable, is the foundation for healthy and fulfilling relationships in life. Yet it takes courage and discipline to develop this.
In "The Pomegranate, " the mother says (in reference to her daughter), "If I defer the grief, I will diminish the gift." She wishes that she could protect her daughter, and keep her from all trouble. But it is in the things that bring pain that lessons are learned. Suffering is, at times, a gift. I need to remind myself this. The turmoil that I am experiencing, the unstable foundation that my life seems to currently be standing on, is molding me, shaping me, and beautifully teaching me life. The restless nights from schoolwork, job-work, and serving others are worth it. The reward will not come now. Today's grief will usher in tomorrow's gift.
No comments:
Post a Comment